James is just laying into rich people here, and at first read, I'm saying, "Yeah, get 'em, James!" ... And then I realize, "Oh...that's me."
It's confession time, "andddddd go!" (said in my best Sam Crum voice)
I've never been a wealthy field owner, but I sure have squandered money away selfishly and stolen money God gave me to use for His purposes. I have spent my years on earth in virtual luxury, satisfying (nearly) all my desires. I'm selfish, selfish, selfish. I don't always realize this because I think to myself, "I worked for this money, so this money is mine." What I forget is that anything I get is simply what God is letting me borrow so that I can help others. I'm supposed to just be the money manager, keeping in mind what the Boss would want me to do with the money. Does a boss like for his managers to spend company money on themselves? Nope. I have to learn to keep this in mind when I am spending paychecks.
When I think about money, all I see is TENSION. Do I have to provide shelter and food for myself and family? Yep, otherwise I would die. But when does providing food and shelter drift into the territory of selfishness? How much is too much? Do I need the biggest and nicest house? Do I need to eat filet mignon? Money scares me because I trust it too much. It very easily becomes a god to me. I trust it completely, and I'm scared when I don't have it. I haven't ever had a lot of money, but I sure love to hold onto what I have.
I just have to remember that it's not my money.
Have I killed innocent people with a weapon in hand? No. But I have bought a dress instead of supporting a missionary. I have spent embarrassing amounts of money on restaurant food out of laziness and selfishness instead of trying to get out of debt so I can honor God in the way I manage His money. I have gone to the movies instead of helping out people that could use my help financially. I have bought expensive makeup just because I'm vain instead of being hospitable. So, really, my selfishness may have caused someone to not have food or medical attention that my money could have provided, had I stopped and thought about what's really important.
Help me, River. Help me learn to treat the money I am entrusted with wisely. Help me make godly choices with what I have. God, rescue me from myself.
2 comments:
I wrote that, by the way.
BK
I remember a scene from the show The Simpsons: "Bart, say grace" (homer)- (Bart>) "Dear God, we pay for this food, sooooo-thanks for nothing". Although most of us would (or did)laugh at this-we really do pray this. Not literally, but in our hearts and actions. I remember a youth pastor when I was in my teens saying in a chapel service- "What if you guys (those of us now in our later 30's, but young bucks then)quit asking- How much can I keep? HOw much is too much (too keep)? what if you started saying- I am going to give it all, only keeping a little for myself."
That question is imprinted on my brain. What if? What if we started thinking like that? What if I started thinking like this? What if we all started using what God has given us for the good of others? That would almost be COVENANTALLY HEAVEN!
Beth- this is OUR confession. I am sure I have contributed to the death of many in my selfishness. Thanks for your authenticity.
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